


Strong men die (while wise men wonder)

by mandsangelfox



Series: Only Then Am I Human [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Gen, Memory Alteration, Revelations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 17:59:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2821175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mandsangelfox/pseuds/mandsangelfox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The glass shattered, the target fell and as always the Soldier remained. Steadfast and alive but alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strong men die (while wise men wonder)

"I'm with you till the end of the line..." 

The moment the man with the strange but familiar face uttered those words the Winter Soldier's world fell apart. Literally as well as metaphorically. The glass shattered, the target fell and as always the Soldier remained. Steadfast and alive but alone. Normally it was a place of comfort for the Asset, but as he watched the target hit the water there was an unfamiliar pang in what was formerly known as his heart, an awareness that this just wasn't right. And with every second that passed and for every depth the body sank the more that feeling grew until it was too much to bear, too much for the normally strong shoulders to carry and with the first ounce of self that he'd known for the longest time the normally vice like grip eased and the Winter Soldier plummeted towards the water.

It was cold, but not of the same kind as the sensation that had settled in the pit of his stomach when he'd watched the target give up the fight. The same fight the Winter Soldier had been fighting for as long as his memory could conjure. But he was beginning to understand that memory was tricky, especially as the name "Bucky" had left the target's lips and a trickle of panic had run the length of his spine, something stirring in the darkness of who he had been before he had become the Asset. Only he wasn't more than this, he couldn't be. 

Could he?

Shaking away the nagging self doubts the soldier refocused his attention to latching his metallic hand around the thick material encasing the target's shoulder and pulled, all but dragging the large man to the nearest shore as if he weighed nothing. And then soaked though to the very bones holding him aloft the Winter Soldier watched, unsure of how to proceed. His training screamed at him to end the other man's life the same way he had countless others and yet he couldn't, it was as if his body refused to listen and all he could do was watch. 

While not sure what he was waiting for he just took in the bruised and battered features of the blonde that had been - and still was - his target, he was insidious, the familiarity having slowly crept past his defences until the Winter Soldier could no longer regard him with a cold proficiency and detached manner. There was something different about this target, something that meant there was no way he could kill him but it wasn't through a lack of trying.

A part of him wanted to hate the other for having stirred such conflicting confusing emotions and yet another, a stronger part,was adamant that it was thankful. For the first time since his last frozen sleep the Asset was beginning to feel something approaching human, which would have been viewed as weakness in any other situation. He wasn't stupid, the war for which he had fought for so long was over, his side had lost. The sheer determination of the target and his comrades had won out over the numbers. And again a stirring of feeling filled the Asset's chest, lingering sensation that perhaps he had once known what it was like to have fought in similar company.

He couldn't stay, survival dictated that he move on, do whatever it took to stay alive. And yet he did not move, save for the moment he watched the target cough up the water which had previously filled his lungs and take his first breath. A strange dichotomy to how he had viewed the target to how he now saw him. Once a stranger with a 'X' painted on his back and now... Well, he wasn't entirely sure, but he wasn't going to stand here and wait. He had come far, but not quite that far. Vulnerable and exposed, past practices had taught him to leave, lick his wounds and recover in private until he was strong again. Weakness was unacceptable and he would be dead before he allowed - what he still perceived as - the other side to catch him in such a moment.

Turning on his heel the Asset left the blonde alive and breathing as well as his former self, determined to forge ahead and leave all of this behind him. Like all memory it was better committed to the past. Only with every step he took he began to realise that there was one thing not so easily pushed aside and not so easily forgotten.

"Who the hell is Bucky?"


End file.
